Sunday, February 26, 2012

The lost months....post surgery (part 1)


I held my incision site for about 3 months.  And made that face.
I wish I had been able to blog during my recovery from surgery, but quite frankly, I was a mess.  In the hospital, there is no time for blogging.  When I got home, there was only time for sleeping and going to the bathroom every five minutes.  I can't even explain how literally and figuratively crappy the weeks after surgery were.


I wrote to some friends in the weeks after surgery, and I will share some of those messages here, so you can see what a freaking lunatic I was:


August 30th
Dude. I am so mentally messed up from undergoing anesthesia. Every time I fall asleep I seem to relive going under (Which I have no memory of) and I wake up by sitting straight up thinking I was dead and suddenly alive. I know it sounds crazy, but I think they pushed me a little too far or something. It's a very scary feeling to feel like you're dying every time you doze off. Needless to say, not a lot of sleep has been had in the past few days.


I'm not out of the woods yet, stomach is still messed up and all that, but maybe a visit soon. I didn't eat much today, too much nausea.


Send me vibes man, keep calling me back!


August 31st
Percocet has been the best so far. Dilauded made me paranoid as heck. Hoping today is a better day! I finally got some sleep last night, so today's focus is eating and hydrating. Such a cute simple life I lead now! 


September 5th
I'm okay, tired and sore. Pain pills are done tomorrow but I think I need a refill because I tried to go without them this am just to see what it would be like, and it wasn't all that much fun. 


Poor Rod is back to work tomorrow. I think he's pretty much tired of taking care of me already. I can't go up and down the stairs a lot, or bend over to scoop the cat litter, or bend over to feed the cat, and it seems to be taking its toll on him. I just want to be normal again! I'm praying every night.


Anyhow, some friends of mine are stopping by today with baked ziti....Rod is soooooooo excited! Now he can eat something other than hot dogs and fast food!

1 comment:

Laura Macaluso said...

I'm thinking that blogging/diary writing is a good way to go when dealing with such a life changer. Blogging/diary writing when depressed can really just feed the monster (a bit like talk therapy, when you just go on and on and on, unable to critique yourself because your perspective is due to the fog), but, with an event like this, it gives you the opportunity to document your mind/body as it changes (ups/downs/ins and outs), to look back and see how far you've come. This is true, isn't it? It takes time, but you did get better after your surgery. I know you have more work ahead, but, you did part 1 successfully. Why not part 2?